The World Did Not End in 2012....2013 Demands More of You...of Us

As many of you know I entered 2012 hanging on to the edge….

2011 was one of the more painful years in my life...

Heartbroken….sad…depleted on so many levels…I had definitely hit my low in 2011…

I entered this year (2012) determined to get my stuff taken care of…(to be fair to myself…I actually started my transformation July, 2011) but I was determined to have a good full year….

I did!!!!!!! Most of you have read my blog so you can figure out... step by step.... how I got back on my feet...

2012 was probably one of the top three “best and rock star awesome” years of my life…

I have had many great experience throughout my entire life…

So what made 2012 different…

I actually made a list of resolutions (reminders )in which I posted on my refrigerator and I looked at them almost every day for the entire year..

They were not crazy unattainable ones…they were just reminders of how I wanted to live…

Here are a few of mine from 2012:

Be Grateful

Thank God

Serve Others

Love

Save

Be Present

Cry When Need Be

Pray

Try As Many New Things as Possible

For most of this year I stayed present in the moment; I focused on everything good in my life (helps when sadness and difficult situations arise….which they did); I was of service to others; I found faith and spirituality; I prayed and talked to God....a lot; I let go; I cut negative people out of my life; I spent a lot of AWESOME time with my kids; I loved…loved…and loved….myself and others…

I also had a great time at work…I tried lots of new adventures….I traveled….I chose to focus on what was good in my life….even during the dark times of the year (this is life on life’s terms after all and dark times do happen…)

If you struggled in 2012....2013 can be different...I am sure of it!

It isn’t too late to live the life you want to live…internally and externally..

Overcoming adversity isn’t easy…making changes isn’t easy….sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy...looking for the good in every situation and every person isn’t easy….letting going and trusting God isn’t always easy….

But I did all these things this year and my year was amazing…

Make a 2013 “reminder” list and post it on your refrigerator….get your stuff together….it isn’t too late…you are not stuck…you can make changes…you can have the life you want….love yourself and others...you deserve it..

Love you and here is to having an awesome 2013!!!!

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G

The Big Bad World

Safe in an unsafe, unloving and cruel world…

I have been thinking a lot about being in an unsafe, cruel and unloving world….I have recently heard many refer to the world in these terms...

I want to challenge you to think differently about your world…our world...

I feel safe, loved, hopeful and full of faith…

It is not because I have never had anything bad happen...

I have not been absent of violence, meanness or cruelty in my life…

My brother was murdered at the hands of a 14 year old carrying a gun….

All of my money was stolen out of my checking account...

My wallet was stolen from the grocery store…

People have said mean things to me; taken advantage; manipulated….hurt me…

Why don’t I scream at the top of my lungs “The world is unsafe”…"it is cruel…"It is evil…it is the apocalypse”

Because I remember all the kindness I have been given in my life

I remember how blessed I am…….

I got lost in Europe and strangers walked me back to where I needed to be…even though it was way out of their way...

I went to Guatemala for one month by myself and stayed in the home of a stranger who fed me, cared for me and worried about me….who helped me..

I got lost in Daniel Ortega’s neighborhood at night in Nicaragua with military all around me….I asked a woman to help me….she did…stayed with me until I was back at the place I needed to be…

I got my wallet stolen: people loaned me money to help me get by…

I was sick and people brought food and medicine to my house…

I needed a friend…people stepped up...loved me and listened..

I was alone for the holidays; people brought me in like one of their family members…

I did suffer great loss when my brother died; people loved me, called me, cried with me, held me…they were there for me…

These are just a few examples.....

I am not saying bad things don't happen...they do...they have to me and probably to you...

It is important; especially in bad situations.... to take time to look around and see the beauty of people; remember the goodness in your life... 

There is so much good in the world….there is safety…there is love…there is kindness…

Let’s not forget  the beauty in people; the beauty that surrounds us

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G

The Wave of Tragedy

So many things to write about in the wake of this tragedy

I thought about writing about the goodness of people and love

I thought about writing about grief and loss

About holding the ones you love close…not wasting a moment…living life each day as if it is your last

About hope and faith

All valuable topics…all my truths….

What I settled on is writing about my disillusionment

I am not sure how many more tragedies we will face before we take action…how many more murders, rapes, robberies will occur before we wake up and really face what is happening…….

Guns are a symptom of the problem

Lack of mental health services is a symptom of the problem

Sensationalized media is a symptom of the problem

What is the problem……

We don’t communicate with one another anymore; we don’t trust anymore, we don’t have community anymore, we don’t respect one another anymore, we don’t listen to each other anymore, we don’t make time for each other anymore…we don't help each other anymore

We are a society of people who want to get ahead at all costs

Who will lie and manipulate to make money

Who will take advantage of each other in order to feel powerful.

We are a society of people who don’t care unless it directly impacts us….

We are a society of people who have no tolerance for the weak, the sick, the old, the mentally ill, the poor

We are a society who are selfish and self- absorbed……..entitled

I know there are many of you out there that don’t fit in this category….that are loving, giving and selfless…

It is no longer functional to disengage from each other and only take care of your own

It is no longer functional to manipulate, use and disrespect people to make money and gain power

It is no longer functional to ignore the weak, the sick, the old and the mentally ill

We are banned together now in the wake of this tradgedy but time will pass and we will go back to our lives and this will become a horrific memory…

The way you feel today about your neighbor, your fellow countryman, humans everywhere that are suffering is what you need to hold on to from now on…regardless of politics, religious opinion, differences...

Change is needed...

I am blessed this did not directly impact anyone I know or love but that does not mean it couldn't tomorrow...

The solution is with you………..The solution is with us

Please

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G

Playing the Lonely Hearts Club Band

Knock Knock

Who is there?

Lonely

Damn...........not who I wanted at my door!!!

Loneliness is a normal and universal emotion 

Everyone at some point in their lives....myself included...has felt the deep grip of loneliness…

Loneliness can trap people and hold them hostage…

Loneliness leads people  in doing things to fill the void …..relationship after relationship…alcohol…food…things way worse and more destructive...

None of this works......and often the loneliness increases...

Instead...

Try to fill yourself up with things that connect you to good people and healthy activities...

Church or a spiritual group, the gym, volunteering with others….something to get yourself out of that space; out of the frame of mind..

Hooray......If lonely isn’t visiting you right now….

But it doesn’t mean you don’t have a responsibility to your fellow human being

Reach out and connect with people…let them know you care….let them know they are not alone…be available, be present….be selfless…

Friend or stranger….we all need someone to smile at us; ask us how we are... to show us we are important and valued…

These small gestures can go a long way to keep loneliness out of our lives....out of my life and out of your life... 

I am blessed this holiday season that my cup is full....I am not visiting with lonely....

But....I still have a responsibility.......as you do...

Put your mittens on and get outside and connect with others....

Reach out if you need….reach toward if you don’t….

We have no other options this holiday season

 "The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”

Mother Teresa

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G.

Life and Death...The Time is Now

I have a lot swirling around in my head….

I have for the last few weeks…

Life and death….

Within the last few months I have known of/heard of five people who have died….

One of cancer

Two of suicide

One from a heart attack

One from an accident

All of these people died…in my opinion……way before their time…

Of course a long time ago I let go of the idea that I ran the universe and that my opinion counted in matters like these…

 How many tragic reminders do I need....do we need

The questions I reflect upon.....

Am I living the life that I should be living or am I stagnant

Am I true to my ideals...

Could I be doing more...Should I be doing more...

Do I walk the walk…not just talk the talk

Am I reminding myself every day to be patient, kind and compassionate to myself, my family, my friends, strangers

Am I going the extra mile...

Do I remember what is really important…

Am I getting sucked up into a meaningless, materialistic and plastic life...

Am I behaving in ways that remind me of what is important…

These are interesting questions that I find myself in deep reflection over…

It is time to stop letting tragedy refocus my attention

For the most part I am living the life I feel guided to live…

But there are some big chunks of things I know I am called to do that can’t be put off much longer….

In my opinion I will have 40 more years of great living left….

My opinion isn’t what matters…and I can’t count on that time...

I have unfinished business to attend to and have a good understanding my actions from this point forward is what really matters...

We don't need any more tragic events as reminders.......Do we????

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G