The Shallow Lives We Live

Many people live plastic and hollow lives….

They live beyond their means to prove that they are successful or accomplished or worthy

Trying to convince themselves and others they have “arrived”

For a second in my life I thought I wanted a nice house and a nice car and a nice wardrobe….that lasted a very short amount of time. That was someone else’s definition of success. That was someone else’s life

I came from nothing material. ...My parents were not educated beyond the 8^th and 9^th grade....Both worked as migrant workers and farm laborers most of their lives

No health benefits, dental coverage, retirement plans; let alone fancy vacations, cars, houses or plastic things to make me or my family feel better

Growing up I intermingled with two types of people…those who really hated me and taunted me for no other reasons besides that I was poor, trashy, unstylish, always smelled musty and smoky…and lived in a trailer in a trailer park

And…

There were those who didn’t seem to mind my stench (I was clean) and my family’s income…or where I laid my head down to sleep….they were kind and gentle and were my friends…..some raised in similar backgrounds but some coming from the “haves”

When I was a kid I was so envious of the “haves” ….I believed that people that had lots of things and looked really good on the outside were happy

I wonder if they were envious of me??

I doubt it….they should have been...

Why

Because I understand firsthand what it is like to be disregarded as trash for doing nothing more than being poor and looking different

I understand firsthand what it is like to go without basic needs

I understand firsthand what it is like to have your teeth pulled because the dentist gives you no other options because you don’t have insurance

I understand how important it is to accept people for who they are as people not for the things they may or may not have

I understand how important a little encouragement and acceptance goes

I understand working for everything I have ever gotten in my life

I understand the power of relationships....Ones that are true and real….ones that are based on love, kindness, compassion and empathy

Ones that can’t be built on anything else but those qualities because I had nothing else to give

Maybe the “haves” of my past shouldn’t envy me….what I wish is that they would have had the ability to really see me.....

I am by my own definition a “have” today. I have dental and medical insurance. I never go without food. I have a house (an actual house). I have the ability to travel with my children. I have a career.

I have the ability to love and care about people without regards to possesions or plastics

I wonder without those childhood experiences would I have the ability to see a human being for who they are in their heart and soul first…not defining them by their material goods….

Maybe I wouldn’t trade my childhood experiences in after all….I would never want to be a person who judged others by anything other than their heart, soul and compassion

How do you judge?

Keeping it Real with Dr. Mary G